This year Housemate bought those boxes that contain: Aero, Smarties, Kit-Kat and Coffee Crisp.

I’m not a huge fan of chocolate but I do love Smarties. They contain more sugar and food colour than chocolate and I love how I can eat them in handfuls. Kit Kat and Aero are tolerable when the Smarties run out, but I think Coffee Crisp is just nasty.

The texture, taste and aftertaste just don’t agree with me.

Who eats Coffee Crisp anyways? It strikes me as something someone like my mother might have eaten in the 1970s under beaded curtains, and macramé owls. I don’t know anyone who openly admits to eating Coffee Crisp… except my housemate.

How do I know this?

Give me a week and I’ll polish off that box of Halloween chocolates. I’ll eat all the Smarties, the Kit Kat and then the Aero. I don’t eat the Coffee Crisp, however. I leave that for him.

“I’m mad that you ate all the Smarties, Nathaniel,” he’ll say. “Couldn’t you have left a few for me? There’s nothing but Coffee Crisp!”

“I thought you like Coffee Crisp?” I counter.

“Yes, well I also like Smarties, it’d be nice to get a few of those before you gobble them all up,” he chides.

If he actually likes Coffee Crisp so much wouldn’t it make sense for him to be happy that I’ve left him with a box full?

We go through this drama every year.

Next year I think we should just buy a family pack of Smarties. He’ll buy them and I’ll eat them.