Five years since my father died

It was five years ago yesterday when my father died due to complications from Lou Gehrig’s Disease or Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis.

I still think there’s a lot of unresolved stuff from that. I took time to reflect and just think about things that are beyond my control. I thought a bit about my father. It’s strange, because my relationship to him doesn’t feel any different now that he’s dead. He had been in prison my whole life, so when he was alive he was a huge mystery.  I knew him through some old letters and faded photos from the ’70s.

My father in the '70s.
My father in the ’70s

I did meet him once, but he gave little in the way of idle conversation or new information. Every word, gesture and facial expression was a riddle.

I kind of wonder where he’s gone to.  I suppose none of us really know what happens in the afterlife until we get there but I think the universe drops hints every now and then.

Yesterday, for a split second, I felt his presence. He was not standing there like some spooky ghost. I felt him observing me with childlike wonder and curiosity as I stood in line to buy cat food.

I am a resident of Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada who has blogged here for 20 years. I like to share my thoughts and feelings on my own online space. From 1998 until 2017 I worked as a journalist and I hope to use this website as an archive for all of my stories.

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